Consider the Engineer (or) On the Subject of the Downed US Airways Flight that Ended Up in the Hudson River

1/19/2009 – NOW UPDATED WITH VIDEO!

I’ve already squawked about this a little bit on Twitter, but the headlines refuse to go away, so I feel I have to vent a little further.

On the subject of the downed US Airways flight that ended up in the Hudson river, let’s be clear, this was no miracle. In no small part because there is no such thing as a miracle—in the divine sense.

The standard for what constitutes a “miracle” has always been lacking (to put it mildly), but yet “miracle” has replaced the words “amazing” and “incredible” and even “heroic” in our language. One has to wonder why this is, considering there has never been a single credible example of natural laws being suspended that was not more easily and reasonably resolved with a non-supernatural explanation. Not a single one. And that still doesn’t sway people a bit. There’s plenty of reason for it of course, some anthropological, some social, some psychological. If you want to read up on this phenomenon a little better, among other books I highly recommend The Demon-Haunted World: Science as a Candle in the Dark by Carl Sagan.

(That said, let’s keep this post focused on just this one example for now.)

One of many problems I have with religion is the childishness of it all. People see a God as some sort of Superman figure, swooping in and halting the airplane by its nose as it plummets into a stadium full of spectators (never mind the hundreds and thousands of vehicular and aviation tragedies that occur on a daily basis that nobody faults God for, he just gets credit for the good stuff). EDITED TO ADD: That’s the beauty of the religion, its inventors have created a scenario where, if something bad happens it’s because “God works in mysterious ways” or “human beings are flawed/sinners” and as soon as something amazingly positive goes down, it’s only thanks to the ever-loving hand of some holy spirit. (Christianity is a self-fulfilling prophecy MACHINE, churning out loopholes and twisted logic left and right until it’s covered its ass as best it can—it’s really enough to make your head spin.)

Humans crave simple answers. Even if those simple answers do nothing but create more complex and unanswerable questions. Luckily for religion, we also have very low standards.

Never mind that if some all-powerful force wanted to save that plane from crashing it wouldn’t have to do it in such a Jerry Bruckheimer fashion. An almighty God could’ve just diverted the birds out of the path of the jet engine (or prevented the plane from malfunctioning because of them). But no, this God’s apparently got a hard-on for Bruce Willis movies.

But when tragedy turns to a story of survival or perseverance (or hell, even when their athletic team wins a game), people waste no time in heaping gratitude and praise on some omnipotent invisible force, rather than giving credit where it’s truly due; to the true heroes, the pilots who land those planes safely, the shipmates who jump in those freezing waters to save someone fallen overboard, to the doctors whose research and steady hand does what religion used to pretend to do, truly helping people survive and overcome their physical and mental ailments.

The first reason I heard given for the divine miraculousness in this situation was the buoyancy of the plane on the water. “How could it possibly float like that, after a crash?” Did anyone consider the engineers who built that plane? Or the buoyancy an airplane can have depending on the amount of fuel inside, or the way an intact plane that size rests on calm waters? Did anyone consider the pilot, who had to have the steady hand and presence of mind to land that plane at such a speed and angle so as not to drive the plane down under the water, or clip the wings upon contact?

None of these things may have played a factor in the survival of those 155 passengers, or maybe all of them did. All I’m asking is, did anyone even consider any of them, before leaping right to a supernatural savior? The answer of course, for the most part, is “no.” Gov. Patterson immediately labeled the near-disaster the “Miracle on the Hudson” to give the media their hook (as cliche as it is). Next, a couple of survivors got in front of the camera and credited “the grace of God” for them managing to survive. And that was really that, wasn’t it. At least, that was enough for Wolf Blitzer.

At least someone out there considered these things. Talking Points Memo posted an email by a reader, an airplane pilot himself, who wrote in with some well-needed perspective on this entire situation…

I’m a pilot (though not an air transport pilot), and like you, I was amazed by yesterday’s events. Capt. Sullenburger’s feat is more than just impressive – I’d say he puts his pants on more than one leg at a time. I’m not aware of any commercial ditchings that didn’t involve fatalities, but:

1. Many ditchings are more last minute than this one, and consequently much rougher. Sullenburger had the presence of mind to plan to ditch early, as soon as he realized that making it to Teterboro would be a stretch (remember that you only get one chance to make a “dead stick” landing, and Teterboro is surrounded by buildings). This early decision was HUGE.

2. The Hudson, yesterday at 4:00 PM, was about as good a ditching spot as you could get (except for being cold). It was flat calm, and it’s long, wide, and straight, which makes it much easier to bring the plane down gently, which is the only way to have a chance at not tearing the plane apart on impact (the reason that smaller planes ditch successfully more often is that they fly much slower – the A320 is about to stall when the plane I fly is approaching its top speed).

3. As you know, it’s also surrounded by docks and rich with rescue craft and ferries, and their prompt arrival at the crash site was also essential to saving everyone.

Sullenburger will be a hero to all pilots for this feat, and he should – he’s got ice water in his veins and is one hell of a pilot. Amazing story.

But that isn’t enough, is it? The heroism of the pilot, and the ingenuity of the airplane engineers, and the good fortune of ideal weather conditions, and the proximity of the crash to rescue vehicles, isn’t enough to satisfy your hunger for warm and cuddly narrative. You need a supernatural version of stories of survival like this, to make you feel safe at night, to make you feel you’re being watched out for, no matter where you are, or what the situation.

Trust me, I get it. I just wish we could grow up, get over our infantile insecurities and egos, and put our trust and our appreciation where it can do us some actual good; in one another.

(Image via Janis Krums.)

UPDATE: Here’s a silly but related video I just found. (It’s a parody.)